
Camus describes the feeling of absurdity in his work The Myth of Sisyphus. He ponders the question does the absurd dictate death? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t, but I am inclined to believe life is truly absurd. How could you not consider the human predicament as truly absurd? We try and protect ourselves from an inevitable demise and fear for those who will suffer a certain fate, yet we perpetuate the cycle by recreating life whose only certainty is its very demise. We’ll eventually mourn or live long enough to be mourned. Shit sounds pretty absurd to me. We seek meaning in the meaningless, we fictionalize stories to dream of alternative lives, we spend our given lives living under the shadow of the next. Whether it be the notion of heaven or simply a concept of legacy. Whatever your rock is, we push it everyday for it to roll down the hill and we commence again, pretty fucking absurd. I guess the trick is to acknowledge the absurdity and find a way to laugh in the face of life, to enjoy every breath of this absurdist comedy, but sometimes the winds blow heavy and we find ourselves unable to laugh. Occasionally, we just have to hold on and hope those around us hold on too.
VOICEMAIL
My phone rang
Let it go to voicemail
Didn’t feel like talking
It rang again
Turned it to silent
Lost myself in the quiet
Maybe I was selfish
Perhaps I was tired
If I’d have known
I’d have answered my phone
But I had no words to say
At least nothing
Capable of taking
Someone else’s pain
She called again
But I didn’t hear a thing
Finished my coffee
Rolled a cigarette
Walked down
Twelve flights of stairs
I called her back
But it was her voicemail
Figured she no longer felt like talking
I rang again
The world felt silent
Surrounded by quiet
Maybe she was selfish
Perhaps she was tired
If she’d known
I didn’t mean to not answer my phone
She might have had some words to say
At least something
Capable of taking
Away some of her pain
I called again
But she couldn’t hear a thing
She’d finished her coffee
Smoked her last cigarette
Flew down
Her twelve story building